Here for YOU Today and There for your FAMILY Tomorrow

What’s Harder than Wedding Seating Charts? The Pre-Nup Conversation


Pre-Nup Conversation

Planning a wedding? Congratulations!! Today’s bride and groom are busy with the details, from selecting a photographer to writing vows and meeting with the caterer. It can be overwhelming, as you plan your first milestone event together, when you want everything to be just right. How can you add the sensitive issue of a pre-nup agreement into the mix now?

Brides magazine’s recent article, “Here's How to Start That Prenup Conversation,” offers some constructive tips to help ease into that conversation.

It’s best to try to have a productive conversation about a pre-nup, by positioning it in the right light. There’s so much negative emotional energy surrounding the idea of a premarital agreement. However, you can begin by asking your fiancé about how you'll address your finances in marriage, like investing and joint banking accounts. This can put it all in a more positive light. Think of a premarital agreement as a financial planning tool to help you have discussions about what your finances will be like during your marriage.

With that in mind, you can approach it as working to prevent a divorce, not preparing for what things will look like when you get divorced. Talk about a pre-nup in terms of fears and goals, so that when you and your fiancé understand the rationales of the request for a pre-nup, it’s generally more accepted and less emotional. I know, easier said than done.

You should also talk with an experienced estate planning attorney and see how your state law applies to your marriage in the event of a divorce. A pre-nup allows you to discuss and draft an agreement that’s focused on both spouses. Find out from your attorney what protections you’d have under state law, and make sure that they're included.

It is important to think of a pre-nup not as an ultimatum before the wedding, but instead as part of preparations for a marriage, which is at its essence a long-term working partnership. Start talking with your intended and your attorney, months before the wedding celebration. You’ll want time to work through the issues, negotiations and the emotions that accompany the discussions. Your attorney will be able to explain why the pre-nup works to protect you both, and you’ll be able to get clear on how you will handle finances, retirement accounts, home ownership, investments and other assets.

Start these discussions before you begin planning the wedding, so that you and your beloved can focus on planning a joyous occasion, with the business side already taken care of.

Do you live in Miami-Dade, Broward, or Palm Beach counties in Florida? Laws are constantly changing-- has your estate plan been reviewed in the last 2-3 years? Call me (954-888-1747) right away for peace of mind. I can help! Please visit for valuable information.

  • My practice is exclusively estate planning and probate,
  • I have prepared numerous estate plans in 16 years of practice,
  • I have administered estates and trusts through Probate all over Florida,
  • I am a Certified Financial Planner Professional™, and
  • I am here for YOU today and there for your FAMILY tomorrow.

Reference: Brides (June 2, 2017) “Here's How to Start That Prenup Conversation”

Why would we recommend D.T.F.? Several Reasons: Your ability to explain complex estate problems, clearly and patiently; your total lack of arrogance and pretense; a strong feeling that you are motivated by what you perceive is best for your client, rather than what would generate the largest legal fees; finally, and importantly, you are a lovely guy. A.C.

Two words cannot sum up the entire process of creating my “trust.” I enjoyed your attention to detail, your patience of explaining terms and conditions until I understood, also giving me copies to read and understand. Thank you for your suggestions on what was best for “me” but still allowing me to make my choice. Most of all, thank you for thinking of “me.” Wells Fargo said “you were the best” I cannot deny that. Again thank you very much for everything. Anna is an asset or a compliment to the firm. She is warm and very caring. It was great doing business. Thank you.